He stated what?

Posted: March 26, 2013 in All Things Trans
Tags: ,

-A letter my Grandfather sent me over me being Transgender and a Natural FTM

I need to add Sweetpea, something to the discussion. Hear me out and realize I am offering this observation out of love and in an attempt to help you see how some of the things you say are perceived. You say below and have said a number of times recently that you “…think like a man and act like one…”

A man’s thinking is shaped by a lifetime of learning AS a boy and man, by the myriad experiences that we have growing up and by the millions of impressions we receive over the course of our lives from everything around us, our parents, siblings, cousins, school, jobs, movies, TV, school, sports and especially all the other people we come into contact with every day. Consequently, a girl or woman can NEVER think like a man because they haven’t been subjected to a lifetime of daily influences that shape who we are as human beings.

All a girl or woman is doing when they say they are thinking and acting like a boy or man is they are thinking or acting like THEY THINK a boy or man would think or act. A girl or woman can never KNOW how a boy or man thinks or acts because they are not one.

You are a girl and you show it in everything you say or do because those are the influences that shaped you growing up and in your daily life. I know you think that now that you are acting like a man, you are being treated like one but you are not, you are simply being treated like a girl who is acting like a boy, which is entirely different.

I am a man. I have spent my life in the company of men, in high school sports, the Marine Corps, in the locker room, in business, in bars and poker rooms, in truck diners, in every walk of life. I know how men think and act in every circumstance. Your conduct is not even close to that of a man’s. It is just a sad reflection of various stereotypes that you have learned from a girl and now a woman’s perspective. You can’t get in a man’s head Honey, just like a man can’t get in yours. You are now, have always been and will always be a girl, a woman.

The antagonism you have experienced in your current job is something you would recognize and understand if you really were a man. It is hard to be a man, especially in a society as screwed up as the one we live in today. Men are frustrated by the assumptions made by so many women, that we are easily replaced, not essential, to the women of the world. We know in our hearts that is not true.

Those of us who are better educated try to make those arguments on paper or in colleges or courtrooms, but the guys who drive trucks, lug heavy loads, serve in the most dangerous arms of the military or as police, firemen and yes, COs know that when it is man against man, no woman can really do what needs to be done to survive, because a million years of evolution made us different. Your posturing is seen as a threat to the men you work with, not just a threat to take away their jobs, which they sincerely believe they can do better, but a threat to their very manhood, their existence as human beings.

GP and I raised two daughters and you and I’ve had hundreds of women work for me in the course of my two careers. I applaud equal treatment for women in the workplace, equal pay and equal advancement for equal work. But everything in life is not equal. There are many things women can do that men cannot. It is absurd to say that there is nothing a man can do that a woman cannot. We all know better but this new societal attitude has blurred our perceptions of the value of our differences. Men and women complement one another. That’s the way God made us.

When we try to take away the differences between us at the most fundamental level, we are undermining the very essence of our strength as a species. When you get in the face of a man and claim you are the same as him, he may not be able to articulate why, but you trigger a rage in his subconscious to fight back to defend the species that is so deeply rooted in our genes it brings out the caveman with a club that is buried in every real man. I have seen that rage in combat, in a fight to the death when all the veneer of civilization is stripped away. I have felt it myself and it is a frightening thing, to observe or experience. It can overwhelm a man in a heartbeat. It is a rage that is only seen in women under one circumstance, and that is when their child is threatened. Mother’s will kill to protect their child but rarely themselves or anyone else, whereas men will kill when they themselves are threatened, often unhesitatingly and unpredictably. Threaten a woman’s baby at your peril and don’t get right up in a rough man’s face, ever, unless you’re ready to go to war. That is what every boy learns growing up, usually the hard way. That’s why boys fight. You stop fighting when you become a man because you know fights between men can easily end in death. Most women have no idea what men are capable of because they’re not capable of it themselves.

Men are bad. The survival of our species has demanded they we be that way. The baddest survived by killing off the nice guys and passing their genes on to their sons. Woman nurture, protect their children and try to keep men from killing their kids, themselves and each other off. That is what I mean by “complement.” But just because we’re all now supposedly civilized, don’t ever think for second that a woman who THINKS she’s bad is any match for a man who is bad. That is a fantasy of modern movies and politics.

As I have told you repeatedly, do whatever you want in the bedroom, but don’t try to stand next to a man and think a short haircut and a deep voice is going to impress him. You just look and sound stupid and piss him off. Keep it up and some redneck (or Muslim) is going to drag you in an alley and tear you up physically or kill you, just because they’re a man and they can.

Be careful out there Sweetheart. I know you’ve heard this before but I’ll say it again, life is hard but it’s a lot harder when you’re stupid. The context of that quote was a Marine sergeant advising his squad before they went into combat on Iwo Jima and what John Wayne in his role as that sergeant meant wasn’t that you’ll be inconvienced if you are stupid, it meant you’ll be killed if you’re stupid. Most men get that right away, women not so much because men and women have different roles in life. Those roles are not all interchangeable just because we want them to be.

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